Dear No One
by EmilyBea
Summary: Short CS holiday story, broken into three parts, where Emma is unlucky in love and decides that for her Christmas wish she'd like to find the right person for her. In an attempt to write what she wants into existence, Emma crafts a letter to the man she wants to find someday and then shenanigans ensue. Based on the song 'Dear No One' by Tori Kelly.
1. Chapter 1

_**A/N: Hey everybody! So this little fic started off as a super fluffy idea I had at the end of the summer. I actually posted about it on tumblr, and a few of you begged me to write it, but I warned you it might be hard. Even then I knew that this was a story I needed a little more time with, and as such, what was once a mixtape contender is now its own separate story. The chapters will be short, but I want to jump back and forth between Emma and Killian's POVs so I felt separating it out was best. It's also now taking place during the holidays, because I have Christmas fever and I don't care who knows it. Anyway, this chapter begins with Emma realizing that her Christmas wish is that she wants to find love. She tries to take a first step to finding it, and it might not go exactly her way... Hope you guys enjoy the fluffy, adorable premise, and thanks, as always, for reading!**_

"Okay Ruby. You got us all together because you said you had something to share. Then you spend all night deflecting. What gives?"

It was the question on everyone's mind since they walked into Ruby and Graham's apartment earlier tonight, and Emma was glad that Elsa had been brave enough to ask it. Ruby had made it clear to each of them that tonight was special and big and important, but when they arrived she never brought up what was actually happening. Instead she'd plied them with wine and food and Christmas cookies, as they gathered together listening to holiday music in the ambiance of her friend's festively decorated home. But while that was lovely (and much needed after Emma's grueling work week), it was odd and more than a little suspicious.

"Well, if you insist on knowing…" Ruby allowed her words to trail off as she lifted the fingerless gloves off of her hands. For anyone else the article of clothing would seem 'extra' or ridiculous. It wasn't _that_ cold outside. Okay it was – because New England in winter was brutal – but inside it was nice and toasty. But that was part of Ruby's style. She was all leather and red and black and wearing biker gloves to a wine night wasn't unheard of. But when she revealed what lay underneath – a huge and absolutely beautiful diamond ring – her friends all gasped at once.

"Holy crap, what a rock!" Emma blurted out, forgetting herself for a moment as she took in the piece of jewelry that had to cost more than she'd make in six months.

"What she said," Mary Margaret, Belle, and Elsa replied at once, and once their shock wore off all four friends were on their feet and celebrating with Ruby. They were so happy for her and for Graham, and it was truly a magical thing. For Ruby, who was a long-time bachelorette with no intention of tying herself down, this was BIG. It was epic, and it spoke to Ruby's love for her boyfriend – nay, fiancé – that she was planning to get married and have that typical, happily ever after.

"When did it happen?" Elsa asked at the same time that Belle inquired. "How did he do it?"

"Last night at dinner. One second we're sharing this to die for tiramisu, I mean like wow wow wow so good, and the next he's proposing."

"She would manage to slip a dessert review in even at a time like this," Emma whispered to Elsa and the two of them laughed together.

"And you're sure it wasn't the tiramisu talking?" Belle asked, her tone a bit sheepish. "Not that you don't love Graham, it's just…"

"I love dessert more than life itself, I know I know," Ruby said as she shook her head. "But no it wasn't that. It was him. I love him, you know? I try to picture what life would be like without him and I can't. He's it for me. He's my person."

"Heck yes he is!" Mary Margaret said happily, no doubt reveling in the fact that she and her husband David had introduced these two lovebirds a little less than a year ago. "God this is wonderful. There's so much to plan, so much to do! This is going to be amazing! And to have the proposal at Christmas time? It's like magic. Real live magic!"

The friends all agreed that this was indeed very special, and the night's conversation shifted from what it had been before to musings on what Graham and Ruby's wedding and life together would look like. It would obviously be different than everyone else's, but the through line that all of the friends had was experience with finding the one. Mary Margaret had David, Belle had her long time boyfriend Will, Elsa had her new beau (who Emma was certain would be a fiancé soon enough) Liam, and the only one who was single and without that kind of experience was Emma. She had never been in love – at least not a love that was made to last forever – and as happy as she was for all of her friends, she couldn't help the feeling that came later that night when she'd returned to her flat and was alone once more.

It wasn't jealousy, per se, because jealousy implied something ugly and resentful. What Emma felt was a longing. She wanted something like what all of her friends had found. What they had was love, true love. The kind of love that lasted and thrived. It was a love built on partnership and connection, and it was a beautiful, magical thing. All her life Emma had wondered what such a love would be like and she'd never found it. She'd often believed that was her fate. She was a girl who came from no family. She had started out in this world with nothing and no one, and maybe she was meant to always be that way. Perhaps it was too much to have been blessed with friends who felt like family. Maybe romantic love wasn't in the cards for her…

' _Emma, that's just crazy talk and you know it!'_

She swore she could hear her friends' voices all saying that to her as she felt herself falling down the rabbit hole of loneliness and she almost laughed at how deeply they were ingrained in her. They had somehow become the voices in her head, the little bits of her conscience that brought her back to her better reality, and the hopeful part of her heart that did want to imagine that love would find her in the end. Shaking her head at her brain's antics, Emma responded aloud though she was still by herself.

"I know, I know. I have to believe good things can happen. I got it."

And she did get it. The problem was Emma didn't know how to help love find her. She was probably doing this all wrong. She wasn't exactly an approachable kind of a person, and she definitely wasn't doing anything to attract a man right now. She was closed off and protective of herself and her boundaries, and as much as that had served her in the past, it was standing in the way of her maybe finding happiness. That was a hard pill to swallow, but it was even harder to imagine what might be a good first step towards changing.

A memory came into her mind at that moment, one from when she was still a young girl in the system. As a kid she'd seen counselor after counselor. Some of them were interested in helping her, while others were bogged down with the masses of other children that they helped. But her last one, the one who saw her as a teen and who fought for her the hardest, helping her get through school, get into college, and start on a path towards a real life, had been adamant that good things came when you wrote your dreams down. Making a plan was all well and fine, but sometimes life and the ways of the world were less defined. Mrs. Hubbard had always told Emma to write what she wanted into existence. It was a way to find the truth of what she wished for, and to get it out there, hopefully helping her move forward.

Though part of her thought this was a little ridiculous, Emma decided she had nothing to lose. She grabbed a pad of paper and a pen, curling up on the couch with a cup of cocoa in hand and she sat there, thinking about what she wanted. Should she write a list of what made the perfect man in her opinion? No, that sounded less personal than she felt was needed in this moment. Emma wasn't looking for a picture perfect Prince Charming who met all sorts of criteria. She wanted someone to share her life with, someone to lean on, someone to feel connected to. In saying that, she didn't know exactly what factors or traits would make someone the right fit for her. She had some ideas of course, but it was foolish to think she could have those answers in full. Love had eluded her this long for a reason, so she quickly dropped the idea of a list and moved onto something very different.

"Okay then, I'll write a letter," Emma said, happy with the idea until her brow furrowed at an obvious hiccup in this plan. "A letter to who? I can't exactly write 'Dear No One.'"

But even as she said the words, her fingers had moved on their own, writing out exactly that. Emma shrugged at it, finding she didn't hate it as much as she thought she would then continued on, writing comlpletey from the heart.

 _Dear No one,_

 _We've never met before, and honestly I have no idea who you are, what you do, or where you're from. You are entirely a mystery, but even with that said I know you already. You are the man I could fall in love with, the man who could bring me to a new place, a place I've never been before._

 _Truth be told there are days I think I just don't need you or the love that you might bring. I like being independent and answering to no one. I like making my own path each and every day. It's what I know and what I'm used to and I fought so hard and for so long to not just survive, but to thrive._ I _have made my life up until now._ I _have built the world I live in and_ I _am damn proud of how far I've come from where I started._

 _But sometimes – honestly more and more often these days – I find myself wishing that you were here. I want someone at my side, someone who cares about me and who wants me just as much as I want him. I want the kind of man who takes my hand wherever we may be and it feels so good that I can't let go. I want the kind of love that greets you each morning and puts you to bed each night. I want to think of you too much. I want distraction and excitement. I want all sorts of firsts, but most importantly lasts. Because I'm not interested in fleeting or temporary. If I'm going to do love, it's gotta be all in. I want to be yours and only yours, and I want you to feel the same._

 _So far this letter has been all about me. I want, I wish, I need… but I know that you have wants and wishes too. If you're the right man for me, then hopefully I already embody those things, and if I don't hopefully they're changes for the better. I'm praying you make me more hopeful, more adventurous, and more willing to take the risk, because loving you –_ choosing _you – will be the greatest risk I've ever taken. I've never let someone in enough to have that, but I could, for you._

 _I know that love is never perfect, because life is messy and can't be controlled. Things won't always be hearts and rainbows, and I promise that I won't run. The old me probably would have. At the first sign of trouble I high tail it out. It's the best way to protect yourself. Staying at a distance and building walls keeps you alive, that's what life has always taught me. But I will stay for you, to fight for this and for us, no matter what comes._

 _When we find each other, and I hope it will be soon, I want you to know that I will be ready. But for now, I'm done looking. If we're meant to be, it'll happen. We'll find each other, as all great loves do, and we'll take it from there, one step at a time._

 _Take care of yourself in the meantime, and I hope you find reasons to smile and to laugh and to feel happy each and every day. It's what you deserve._

 _Wishing you were here, but waiting until it happens…_

 _Emma_

When the letter was written, Emma read it and read it again, finding that she liked everything that she'd crafted on the page. It was honest and truthful, and yes, sappy as could be, but that wasn't her fault. Of course it was going to be sappy! Emma was hoping for true love – and that kind of love always seemed to be just a little bit cheesy. She smiled in spite of herself, putting the letter on top of a stack of papers and leaving it for now, knowing if it was going to work she had to, at some point, leave it alone.

As she went through the rest of her night, eventually falling asleep, Emma found her dreams continued to build off that letter. That night she knew she had visions of the man she wanted, but come morning it was all just a little vague. Dark hair, piercing eyes, a smile that made her knees weak. These were the things she remembered, but it wasn't a definite person. At least not yet. Still, this mysterious man, a man who's face she still hadn't seen was with her through her whole day. From getting coffee at Belle's bakery in the morning, to work at the office, and back home again, the feeling of him was still there. And after everything, Emma found herself wanting to reread her letter. She didn't want to change anything per se, she just wanted to see if it stacked up as well in the morning light… there was just one problem. She couldn't find it.

"Oh shit," she said aloud, her nerves starting to fray as she looked at the table where it had been and realized there were no papers there. She ran back through her morning, half remembering her pre-coffee existence and she had a trickling sense of fear. She'd needed the papers underneath the letter for work. Oh God had she really been so stupid? She rummaged through her bag, eventually dumping the whole thing out frantically searching for the letter, but it was gone. Emma prayed that maybe she'd moved it last night, and she searched every room she'd been in, in every nook and cranny. She dug inside the couch, behind the chair, beneath every sheet and pillow on her bed, but nothing. It was gone.

Resigning herself to this cold, terrifying reality, the one that had her letter – her honest but completely embarrassing letter – out somewhere in the world, Emma sat down on the couch and hid her face in her hands, sending up a last resort prayer.

 _Please don't let anyone find it!_ she silently begged, but luckily the universe didn't hear that request. Instead, it was already on its way to granting Emma her Christmas wish.

 _ **Post-Note: So there we have it. Just a cute, quick fluffy chapter that isn't super original, but packed enough holiday love story promise for my muse. I hope that you guys have enjoyed and I'm eager to see what you think. I'm hoping to get the next chapter posted in about two weeks, and then the last chapter the week after. Hopefully I can manage that since school is starting to wind down for the semester. Anyway thanks for reading and I hope you have a great rest of your weekend!**_


	2. Chapter 2

_**A/N: Hey everyone! Want to start by saying thanks to all of you for the support and the kind reviews and comments on this story. It's been so nice to see you all enjoy it so much, and it's made writing these next few chapters so fun. My writing schedule has been delayed because of school, however, I am happy to say that this story is getting not one, but two updates this weekend. Tonight we have this chapter, and tomorrow is part three. That was my stated conclusion point when I started writing this, but I could be convinced to write an epilogue too… anyway thanks so much for reading and I would love to hear what you all think about this update!**_

One of the most tedious parts of any new move was trying to find a new routine, and a new collection of favorite places. Uprooting one's life was a difficult task and not easily done, and it was compounded for Killian Jones by the fact that his old life was in London and his new one was in the US. But after a few weeks of working at it, he finally felt like he was starting to settle.

That feeling, alas, was not thanks to the quientesciential charms of the city of Boston, or the strange but friendly neighbors that seemed to inhabit his apartment building. It wasn't even the fact that he was once again working with his brother and best friend after years of operating from different parts of the world. No, the reason he was starting to feel like he just might belong here was rather singular, and it all hinged on the beautiful and entrancing blonde who just so happened to frequent the coffee shop closest to his new place.

The first day that he'd entered Belle's, a neighborhood staple if his best friend Will could be could be trusted, Killian found it to be a mostly ordinary place. It was themed with books and literature and stories, and it was charming, even if the coffee was far from the best. He found it passable enough, and he had to admit he'd enjoyed the muffin far more than he normally would, but all of those little pieces would have been unremarkable until she walked in, a vision in red. Or, to be more precise, a red scarf.

That first moment, when he'd seen his mystery woman for the first time, Killian was struck by her very presence. He'd succumbed to all those clichés he used to scoff at in the movies: time standing still, his heart skipping a beat, the sunlight from outside seeming to trickle in just a bit more to cast her in its golden glow. But he didn't give a damn about what he must seem like to others. All that mattered was that he knew all at once that he had to know her. Whoever this woman was, Killian knew she was special, and if wasn't all thanks to the lithe beauty of her figure, or the perfectly pretty symmetry of her face. It was her eyes, big and green and sparkling with the exertion of life itself. She was radiant in every way, a siren almost, and it seemed he was just some bumbling sailor in that metaphor, for he was helpless to do anything but stop and stare at her.

After a week of said staring, which was frankly an embarrassment given that Killian had always prided himself on his charm and being able to speak to a pretty woman, Killian had planned yesterday to finally make his move. He was going to speak to this creature whose presence always lingered. She'd taken up residence in his thoughts, distracting him in ways no one else ever had, and it was time to man up and ask her out, or at the very least ask her name. But just as he had summoned up the courage to do so, all hell had broken loose. The usually busy buzz of Belle's café had exploded with an unexpected pre-school rush, and with so many added people and such an increase of noise and sound, his window had been closed and the woman he'd been watching had run off, departing as soon as she had her coffee for whatever her day held in store.

As she was leaving, however, Killian noticed that she dropped something. Immediately he moved through the crowd to retrieve it, fending off the elbows and rushed gestures of too many teenagers to count, and when he collected the item he found it was a piece of paper, and more specifically a letter. Not wanting to pry, Killian had only glanced at the top of the page, and what he saw there had peaked his curiosity.

' _Dear No One'_

It was such an unusual way to open correspondence like this, and in the face of such a greeting, Killian felt a yearning to read more. There was no science or hard fact behind it, but he could feel that this letter was written by the woman he'd been meaning to talk to. He also knew it was intimate, not through any sort of proof (nor from having read the contents of the letter) but because of the way it was written. From his fleeting glance he'd seen the penmanship displayed, the thorough, thoughtful, feminine script illustrated on the page. It was a throw back to times of old, when letter writing was what was done, and though her message seemed to have no specific recipient, Killian knew it wasn't his to read.

Unfortunately by the time he'd gathered the paper she was gone, and though he chased her outside, the busy streets had made her lost to him. She was gone now, and his options were very few. He could, in theory, go back inside and leave this with a barista in the hopes they had something like a lost and found. He could discard it back where he'd found it and leave it to be trampled by God knew how many patrons of the café, or he could take it with him, knowing that though it would tempt him ceaselessly, he wouldn't read it. It wouldn't be right. No. If he were to take it he'd need to return it. That was the only thing to be done.

So here he was, a full day later and gearing up for the moment of truth. He'd been eager all morning, anxiously awaiting that sacred time of day, and finally he was off, headed from his apartment towards Belle's with intention and purpose. It took all of thirty seconds of walking, however, before a black town car rolled up beside him, and a voice he knew all too well called out, pulling him from his mental prep for the moment ahead.

"Hey Jones, you doing all right?"

Killian looked up at his good friend and his long time second at work, Will Scarlet. He could see his friend's cocky grin at having found Killian distracted. It was a rare occurrence, or at least it had been when they were still in London. Will had been over here longer than Killian, but it was really only a few years, and in that time nothing had changed on Killian's end. He was focused on his career and his business, as he should be. But since moving Killian had been less than entirely fixated on work. Still, Killian didn't like his long time friend drawing attention to that, and he sobered his features that might speak to his surprise

"I feel like I should be asking you the same thing. This is hardly on your way to the office."

"No it's not, but you see, I have this friend – dreadfully dull fellow – real stick in the mud. Anyway he is a mad man and claims to like walking in freezing temperatures…"

Killian mumbled that it wasn't that bad out, but truth be told it was rather brisk. Okay it was likely certifiably frigid but he hadn't really noticed it until now. Before he could say that, Will pressed on.

"But see the problem is he's also my boss. So I've got to look out for him not just for the sake of friendship but for business too. And I decided, you know what? What good is the company car and the driver and the perks if said boss ends up dying of hypothermia? If he dies I'm likely out of the job, and then my perks are gone too. Which would be a real shame because I've truly become dependent on the pomp and the frill. So I decided, it's really just too much to risk. Boss' wants be damned. You're not walking to work today." Killian almost told him to fuck off with that idea, knowing he had every intention of getting to the bakery this morning, but quickly Will slipped in a final comment. "Don't worry we're still going to Belle's. You've still got time to make your move."

Hearing Will mention a private intention of his, Killian's spine went straight, and he couldn't help but start to ask the question. "How did you-?"

"Know you were going to Belle's? My girl is the owner, mate. You really think she hasn't mentioned it to me?"

"Oh," Killian said, taken aback by the revelation. "So this Belle and your Belle…"

"One and the same. Thus the reason I said you should check it out," Will said with a self-satisfied chuckle. "And I'd warn you to watch yourself when it comes to her, since you seem quite taken with her place, but I know your eyes haven't been aimed at my woman. You've another lass in mind with all these little visits."

Will's words were teasing, and he looked every bit the rascal that he'd been when they were kids at having Killian cornered like this. You'd never know by that expression that they'd all grown up. In that moment Will looked like a kid on Christmas. But Killian knew fighting this or denying the truth was useless, instead he followed his friend's next bit of advice. "Just get in the car. Start the day off less frozen."

Killian sighed before giving up any pretense of refusal, sliding into the vehicle next to Will who still looked all too pleased with himself. But even if Killian found his friend's flair for the dramatic just a little bit taxing, he had to admit that if he were an outsider this might actually be funny. All things considered, Killian needed that humor and lightness in his life. Having an elder brother like Liam had always been a blessing, it meant he had a built in friend to walk through the world with, but Liam could be summed up entirely with only one word: driven. And since humor didn't translate into better business earnings, it wasn't usually on his radar. Still, to be fair, that overarching assessment of Liam had been shifting lately, thanks very much to Killian's soon to be sister in law, a wonderful (and extremely patient) woman named Elsa. Killian knew it was Elsa's input that had gotten him back here and working with his brother at all. She was a lover of family, and in the times he'd met her she was nothing but kind and generous, and luckily she brought out similar personal shades in his brother when they were together.

"So. Should I send out the save the dates now? I'm assuming with all this build up we're gonna pop the big question today."

 _Bloody hell!_ This was what Killian had been afraid of when getting into the car. "Watch it Will," Killian warned as his friend only laughed, shaking his head.

"I'm sorry, mate, I couldn't help it. You're so easy to mess with these days. Who knew all it would take to make that impenetrable armor of yours shatter was a pretty girl?"

"I'm not talking about this with you." _Or anyone,_ Killian added in his mind, firm in his choice not to submit himself to the embarrassment or teasing.

"Who said anything about you talking? I'm the one with all the information. Did a little digging to supplement what I already knew about her. Just basic stuff, you know, social security number, date of birth, last known addresses. We should start with basics though. Name: E-,"

"Will, stop!" Killian yelled, and the force of his tone sounded out through the town car. It was enough for his friend to still for a moment, his eyes growing more and more curious. "Look I realize you think you're helping me, but did it ever occur to you that investigating a woman I've never so much as said hello to was stepping seriously over the line?"

"Uh, no," Will said honestly, looking down at his phone and then back to Killian. "I was thinking, 'hey, my mate likes this girl, she's friends with my Belle. Plus, August my P.I. friend owes me a favor, and I can help him see if she's even worth having his knickers in a twist over in the first place.'"

"She's worth it," Killian ground out, ignoring mention of his 'knickers' which was an attempt by Will at being funny. "And I don't need whatever you've got to know that. I don't want to hear any of it, Will, and I doubt Belle will be happy to hear what you've done, if she is in fact her friend."

"I was just kidding about the details, Killian. Everything I know I know from first hand experience."

Killian stayed quiet at that, but he was sure his eyes gave away his feelings to his friend. He was glad that Will hadn't ordered some crazy background check, but the crux of the issue wasn't that Will knew this woman, it was that Killian wanted to know her too, and not second-hand details from Will, but first hand ones of his own.

"Ah I get it. You want to figure it all out for yourself," Will said, the dots finally connecting and Killian gave one stiff nod and Will turned his phone off and threw it back in his pocket. "Well in that case I won't tell you. Won't even say her name. But I hope you've got a plan for today, man. Otherwise this is going to be interesting."

There was no more time to discuss this as the car pulled up to the café in question, and Killian knew he was now a little earlier than he had been the past week. This likely meant that he had time to make the plan Will was talking about, since he definitely didn't have one aside from approaching her today. But when he walked in the door, he was stunned to find that she was already here and looking more than a little frazzled as she spoke with the owner.

"So you're sure, Belle? No one dropped anything off with you guys yesterday?"

Her voice might be doused in emotion, which appeared to be a mix of worry and earnestness, but it still sang out like a song to his ears. God she was amazing, and she'd just given him an in. She was obviously looking for the letter, and he had it. All her had to do was give it to her…

"No, Emma. I'm sorry, but maybe it's a good thing? You're so worried about this letter, but it probably got swept up and thrown out or it's just lost in your house somewhere."

"If I never see that letter again I'll be all too happy," the woman – Emma – said, stopping Killian in his tracks. She let out a sigh that seemed to be somewhat relieved before confessing more to her friend. "I can't even tell you how mortified I'd be if someone found it. I mean what was I thinking, Belle?"

"You were thinking it's Christmas and that there's no better time than Christmas to want more and to believe that good things come to those who are good themselves."

"Yeah. I thought maybe this year, but… well I guess I should have known better."

Killian's heart clenched at the thought, knowing that despite the fact that he would never say it out loud, he felt the same way about wanting more than his life currently held. Whatever she'd written in that note, it was starting to become clear that Emma had put her honest, vulnerable wishes onto the page. He was dying to know what those wishes might be, but in the face of her embarrassment and anxiety he was so glad he never read on. It would have ruined everything before they even had a chance to begin, and even now Killian was wondering if he should mention to her that he had the letter and that it was safe and still a secret, but more than being honest about that, Killian had a need to see that doubt that had washed over Emma disappear. He hated that she'd given up hope, and if he had his way, he would do anything in his power to see that distrust gone for good.

"Hey ladies, you gonna stand around all day and yammer on, or you gonna order your coffee and let us all get about our business?"

The harsh censure from the shorter, incredibly irritated, man in front of Killian in line was grating and rude. But the worst of it was that he was loud, loud enough to draw the attention of everyone in the place, including Emma. On a normal day, Killian knew Emma was the kind of woman who wouldn't allow herself to feel chastised or belittled, but her worries about the letter continued to linger, and he acted on instinct, stepping in when she needed a bit of support.

"No offense, mate, but your business can't be all that important."

"You want to say that again to my face, pretty boy?" the man said with a sneer and Killian tried not to laugh as the sudden spark of rage this tiny man was showing. He was obviously over compensating for something, but as Killian snuck a look back at Emma, seeing her attention was fully on the exchange, he decided taking the high road might be best.

"Sure. I said your business can't be all that important. There are two other lines open, the queue is moving same as ever, and if this was the kind of morning where you needed caffeine in thirty seconds I hardly think you'd have stopped here."

"You don't know me or anything about me."

"I know enough," Killian hedged, lowering his voice just a smidge, but bringing it to that tone that had been called intimidating a time or two before. "Causing a scene over two friends catching up who have no bearing on your day or your life speaks volumes. Trust me."

"And what's it got to do with you?"

"Very little. But the more you complain, the more tedious my day gets. So please, do us all a favor and pipe down."

"You really going to let him talk like this to me, Belle?" The man said and Killian looked over to Emma's friend who simply shrugged, even as Killian could see the light of a would-be smile in her eyes.

"What's that old saying, Leroy? The customer is always right? Can't seem to argue today."

"Hey, I'm a customer!" Leroy protested and Belle shook her head.

"No, you're a grumpy old Grinch," Belle said nodding towards one of the other baristas who put together what must be the man's regular order. "And tomorrow I won't be so generous. New rule – you want coffee, you play nice. Got it?"

Leroy mumbled something that sounded less than kind hearted, but Killian knew it was still agreement, and when the man was finally out of the door the whole place seemed to lighten. People went back to their conversations, and Killian moved up in the line, ordering his own coffee and breakfast, and then looking around for Emma, only to discover she'd been waiting for him.

"Thanks for doing that. It's only Leroy, but I just…"

"Couldn't deal today?" Killian filled in and Emma nodded, a small smile spreading as she did.

"I'm Emma, by the way. Emma Swan."

"Killian Jones," he said, extending his hand as she did hers. It was a mild mannered way of greeting someone, but when their skin touched Killian felt a bolt of awareness, another sign that Emma was more than a mere woman, but someone he desired more than nearly anything else.

"You make a habit of rescuing damsels being accosted by short custodians?" Emma teased and Killian chuckled, taking a half step closer to her on instinct and tracking the way her jade colored eyes widened ever so slightly and her breathing seemed to hitch.

"I'd hardly call you a mere damsel, love."

A moment passed between them and Killian fought the urge to pull her close and kiss her senseless. He knew she would taste of cocoa and cinnamon, her normal order every morning, but it was too damn fast and he knew it. The problem was he couldn't seem to get any other words out to prolong this little interlude, and though Emma was seemingly caught up in the same sensual haze that he was, eventually she cleared her throat and came back down to reality.

"Right. Well, thanks again. I better be going."

"Would you like to get a coffee?" Killian asked, and immediately when he said it he felt like a bumbling teenager. Jesus, what a terrible line, and worse it was completely ridiculous given the current situation. Still, he couldn't regret the ill-timed move, not when Emma grinned, a look of actually tangible enjoyment coloring her face.

"Uh, we've already got coffee."

"I meant tomorrow, love. I'd have asked for dinner, but you seem the kind of woman who tests the waters before taking to the sea."

Again he was talking almost nonsense. Taking to the sea? Really? Who said that? It didn't matter though because Emma laughed at the phrasing, and the sound was so melodic and breathtaking Killian wanted to hear it a million more times. He waited in hopeful anticipation, hoping her laughter spoke to a willingness to say yes instead of blow him off, and though it only took a few seconds for her to respond, Killian felt the anticipation of the moment weighing heavily.

"Coffee sounds good, actually. But can we maybe… not come here? I love Belle, and this place, but first dates at your friend's bakery…" Emma trailed off, leaving her thoughts well expressed even though she didn't speak them aloud. It would be awkward, and since Belle was dating Will, Killian had to believe she likely had that same tendency towards meddling and constantly observing. "Not that this is a date. I mean, you know, maybe it is. But you didn't say - I mean -,"

Unwilling to let Emma flounder in the question any longer, even though he enjoyed that she seemed to be every bit as flustered as he was, Killian moved closer, surprising them both by taking her hand in his. That instant spark was there again, and it affected him, rocking him to his core, and making his words come out with more gravel than they normally would.

"Oh it's definitely a date, Emma. Hopefully one of many."

"Yeah?" Emma asked, her cheeks turning a bit pink as she asked. Killian was powerless to do anything but nod, his eyes falling down to her lips before they came back to hers as she responded. "Well okay then."

And with a few more words shared between them, as well as their numbers and details of tomorrow's date, Killian and Emma parted ways, much to Killian's dismay. But in the end. Killian knew a little separation would be all right. Because today had only been the start of what was to come, and tomorrow Killian knew he'd do everything he could to make Emma see what kind of magic could be between them.

 _ **Post-Note: So there we have it. A date has been arranged, the meet cute has happened, and full disclosure we're getting a little time jump in the next chapter. But don't worry, the Christmas feels are strong with the next one for sure. We'll also get a little drama, and a whole lot of love, and then likely an epilogue in the weeks following. Anyway thanks so much to all of you for reading. If you're celebrating I hope you're having a lovely, restful Christmas season, and if not I hope you're still having a wonderful December. See you all next time and thanks for taking the time!**_


	3. Chapter 3

_**A/N: So here is the last official part of the story (it was the conclusion that I saw in my head originally), but as I mentioned before, there might be an epilogue coming in the next few weeks. This chapter flashes forward a few weeks from the last one and is set on Christmas Eve. There's a lot that happens and a lot of feels, but rest assured that by the end this is the same kind of fluff I love to write, especially around the holidays. Hope that you all enjoy this installment and thanks so much for reading!**_

Three weeks was really no time at all, twenty one days, give or take, but for Emma, the last three weeks had been incredible.

Since meeting Killian, Emma had felt like things were finally beginning to click. She didn't know what had made it happen - fate, chance, some sort of universal pull - but whatever had brought her and Killian together she was grateful for it. Right now, things between them felt like a perfect mix. He'd found her and she'd found him at the right time. For the first time she'd been somewhat open to letting someone in. She had admitted to herself that she wanted love, and yet, even though she'd already had that tough conversation with herself, Emma knew in her heart Killian would have inspired the change in her one way or another. Truth was, Killian was undeniable, and her attraction to him was easily the strongest of any one she'd ever had before.

The timing of all of this was somewhat suspect, however. Because really, who actually fell in love at Christmas other than people in those cheesy hallmark movies? It was so cliché, but at the same time what she felt for Killian was so real. It didn't matter that when they'd had their first date there'd been Christmas flavored cocoas or the scent of pine from the trees that decorated the coffee shop. It didn't matter that when Killian asked her out to dinner that same night there were Christmas lights that twinkled and glowed a perfect white gold color all along Newbury Street where their restaurant was. It didn't even matter that her favorite Christmas songs seemed to crop up any time they were together, and that those old melodies that sang of sharing one's heart at Christmas rang out as incredibly relevant with all she was feeling. In all honesty, this new relationship could have started in any season and Emma would have felt this pull. It was just a bonus that the aura of Christmas was all around. Things between Killian and Emma already felt a little magical, so the spirit of the holiday was simply the cherry on top.

"I'd give anything to know your thoughts right now, love."

Killian murmured the words as he came up behind her, his hands wrapping around her in a loving hold. Emma couldn't help but let out a sigh of relief, her body melting into his like it was completely normal, because it was fast becoming the norm. She couldn't help how much comfort she took in his presence, and after having that moment with herself and admitting all that she wanted and was looking for, she'd taken the plunge and decided to be brave. It took a lot of courage for Emma to be transparent with her feelings and to show Killian how much he'd come to mean to her, but though it was a big change, Emma found strength in Killian's unapologetic and completely obvious infatuation with her.

"I was just thinking that it's Christmas, and I kind of can't believe this is my life. Last year it was just me. I was rolling solo to this party with my friends, but they all had someone. And this year that's different."

"You're damn right it is," Killian growled, his mouth coming down to kiss her neck as Emma laughed and turned around in his embrace. She was going to say something teasing, maybe poke a little fun at how serious he was about things already, but then she looked in his ocean blue eyes and her breath caught. The words in her brain flitted away, and all she could think was that this look wasn't one of mere interest and attraction. It was raw passion, and, dare she say, love. "I can't imagine someone I'd rather be with on this day than you, Emma. I've been alone in the past too, more than I ever wished to be. But they call it the season of blessings, and for the first time I feel that. Any moment that I'm with you is no less than a gift."

"Don't you think it's a little soon to feel like this?" Emma asked, her words genuinely curious even though her heart was telling her that it wasn't too fast. Still, she wanted to hear it from Killian himself.

"When you know, you know, Emma. I truly believe that, and from the moment I saw you I knew that you were different. You take me to new places. You make my world better and brighter. I can't seem to let you go, even for a moment. You're with me, love. Always."

"Sounds pretty serious," Emma said with a smile, her heart fluttering in her chest as Killian grinned and his hand came up to cup her cheek.

"Aye, because it is, and I intend to show you just how serious very soon."

Unable to resist any longer, Emma pressed a kiss to his lips and she reveled in the fact that they were instantly in this together. It took just a moment for the kiss to deepen and for their mutual lust to grow stronger between them. What started out as sweet and soft morphed into something that melted her insides and made her want so much more. Killian could feel it too, and the way his hands roamed over her body, toying with the hem of her form fitting dress made Emma moan. They had places to be, a party with all her friends, and surprisingly with Killian's friends too (because it turned out there was already a lot of overlap in their lives what with Liam dating Elsa and Belle and Will being together), but Emma was oh so tempted to let this first stage turn to more. Her mind wandered to the things she and Killian had done the past few weeks, the way he always seemed to read her body, eliciting pleasure and leaving her dizzy wanting more. He was everything she'd ever imagined, and though they'd been together only hours before, Emma could feel her cravings grow and her want for more rise higher.

"Any more of that and we won't be getting to this party, Swan," Killian said as he tore his lips from hers, his forehead resting against hers as his breath came out more labored, mirroring hers. Emma knew he was right, but still, it was hard to pull back when she knew how good things were between them.

"You're right, you're right. But just know I have a whole lot of ideas for later…"

"I can hardly wait," Killian said adamantly, before dropping one last kiss to her lips and moving towards his closet. "Just give me a few minutes, love. I'll be ready to go in no time."

Emma watched him go and debated staying for the show, knowing how sexy Killian was underneath those clothes of his, but if they had any hope of getting to the party she had to give herself some space. She walked out into the rest of his condo, finding herself meandering towards his study and she looked around, taking comfort in the dark colors and the smell of books and paper. They hadn't spent a whole lot of time in here, but Emma had loved it when he gave her the tour of his place weeks ago. It had a timeless feel, looking more like a little library than anything else, and Emma found she loved the smell of all these books and the fireplace in the corner. It felt homey even while it was dignified, and with the decorations hung about just like in the rest of Killian's home, it was festive and comforting.

Roaming through the room, Emma found herself scanning the titles of the books that he had, noticing a lot of overlap between his favorites and the classics that she loved as well. By the time she made it over to his desk, Emma was full on smiling and thinking that she could tuck herself away in here for hours with a good book and a cup of cocoa, but then something caught her eye, a piece of parchment that seemed familiar, folded in threes just like a letter.

Curiosity won out in the end, and Emma moved to see the piece of paper only to feel her stomach drop when she opened up the page. It was a complete shock to her system to see those three little words at the top: _'Dear No One,'_ and Emma felt her heart plunge when realization kicked in. Killian had her letter! He had her letter and he never told her. Why had he done that? And God, how could she have been so stupid?

Without thinking or giving herself time to process any of this or to ask Killian what the hell was going on, Emma started moving. She took the letter with her, rushing into the front hall and grabbing her coat. She had to get out of there, and she had to go now, but as she opened the door and heard Killian call out to see if that was her, a sob broke through. She looked down at the letter and actually felt she might be sick, and she dropped it to the floor as she slammed the door behind her, leaving the man she was foolish enough to fall in love with as quickly as she could.

Moving through the freezing streets of Boston, Emma felt like her whole world was crumbling down. Here she was thinking that she'd finally found the one for her. When they were together, Emma felt so much hope and possibility. She'd been falling from the start, and with every day another piece of her heart had become his. But this was a betrayal, right? He had to know the letter was hers. There was no way it could just be a coincidence, and as Emma ran back through that morning that they first spoke in her head, she realized he had to have heard her talking to Belle. God he must think she was such an idiot! Stupid, stupid, stupid!

Pulling her phone from her pocket, Emma couldn't think to do anything but call her friends. She pressed a random number of speed dial, and when Ruby answered Emma finally broke down. It took all of three seconds for Ruby to realize something was wrong, and she immediately went into protective friend mode. "Emma where are you? Just tell me where you are and I'll be there."

Emma looked and saw that she'd walked in the direction of one of the city's oldest diners, and it appeared to be open despite the holiday. Ruby told her to get inside and out of the cold and promised to be there in ten minutes. She was there in five, and with her were Emma's other friends, all looking just as worried and ready to do whatever it took to help her.

"Oh Emma, what happened?" Belle said, coming immediately to sit with her in her booth and Emma buried her face in her hands begging herself silently not to cry as she tried to tell her friends the story.

"He knew this whole time about the letter. He found it, Belle. He had it for weeks."

"A letter?" Mary Margaret asked. "What letter? And who is 'he?'"

Emma swallowed down her pride, filling the rest of the friends in about what she'd done and how she'd crafted a letter that spelled out everything that she wanted for her future and in a partner. She told them about how she'd felt alone and how she'd wanted that to change more than anything. She even admitted that despite the fact that it was silly and ridiculous, it was her Christmas wish. Then she told them about how she lost the letter, and explained that she found it again in Killian's house just moments ago.

"So what exactly are you upset about?" Elsa asked, not trying to be mean, but genuinely trying to understand what would have triggered Emma so fiercely. "Is it the fact that he read it, or the fact that he didn't tell you?"

"Both. I mean I knew this was too good to be true. I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop, and here it is."

"But is it really so bad, Emma?" Belle asked sincerely. "So he read your letter? So what? He still wants you anyway. I think he truly wants to be the man that you were writing to. He loves you, Emma. He just made a mistake in not telling you about it."

"You really believe that, Belle? You think he loves me?" Emma asked, her voice breaking as she tried to choke the words out. God she wanted them to be true, but she just couldn't trust it. Not after everything she had been through. "He was just messing with me. He probably read that letter and thought I was an easy mark or something. Just some sad, lonely girl to spend some time with."

"Oh bull shit!" Ruby exclaimed, causing all the friends to gasp and then go varying degrees of slack-jawed. "You know that's not true, Emma. That's your fear talking. You're better than this."

"Ruby," Mary Margaret said, trying to get their friend to calm down a bit but Ruby shook her head.

"No, I'm not going to sit here and watch you cave to your past, Ems. We all know you've been hurt before. We get it, and God knows that it hasn't been fair or easy. But Killian is not those other guys. He's not out to hurt you. He would do anything not to. And yeah it sounds like he fucked up with this letter, obviously he should have told you that he had it if you're certain that he knew it was yours, but you're everything to him. Everything."

"You can't know that, Ruby," Emma said, even though she was hoping so hard that her friend's claims were true. Deep down she knew Killian wasn't a bad man. The man she knew and had fallen in love with was kind and good. He did his best by everyone, and he looked at her like she was, in fact, everything. Still it was hard to imagine that could be real, and this secret that he'd kept for whatever reason was her perfect way out. A lifetime of running had prepped her for this, and instinct demanded that she get out while she still could, even if it meant breaking her heart in the process.

"Hell if I can't! You don't propose to someone you're just 'messing with' Emma."

"Wait, what?" Emma asked, shocked at the word and for the first time Ruby looked stricken. Her friend had said too much, but there was no going back now. That word rang around in Emma's head, and she knew she wouldn't stop until she knew everything.

"Shit. I wasn't supposed to say that."

"No, you weren't," Elsa said with a sigh and Emma looked to her friend for clarification, silently pleading with Elsa to make all of this more clear. "But now that it's out there… Killian told Liam that you're the one last night Emma. When you guys came for dinner, they talked, and Liam said he's never seen his brother like this before. Killian plans to propose Emma. I don't know when, I think soon after the holidays, but they were talking and…" 

"And Killian told Liam that he was going to give you his mother's ring," Mary Margaret said, filling in.

"He said that?" Emma whispered. Her mind almost not believing something like this could be true, even though she wished it was so desperately. Emma and Killian had only been dating for a short while, but she knew of Killian's love for his mother, and she had to imagine that if he was planning to trust her with such a precious family heirloom, then he was also truly trusting her with all his heart and soul.

"Yeah," Ruby said, reaching across the table to take Emma's hand. "I'm sorry for being harsh, but it's like I said: he loves you. So whatever happened with the letter, it can't be as bad as you're thinking. You have to give him the chance to explain, and you have to try and believe that you, Emma Swan, aren't just some 'lonely girl' to humor for a while. You're a catch, and he's damn lucky to have you."

All of her friends echoed Ruby's statement, and Emma felt more tears pooling in her eyes. It was sweet of them to say that, and though she knew all of that rationally, it was easy for her to underestimate herself. Good things were so rare in her life for so long, and the way that Killian made her feel was so much better than good. It was otherworldly, almost like magic, and she was terrified that it might not last or be completely genuine. But it wasn't anything that Killian had really done that made her quick to believe that. It was her own personal baggage, and Emma had to deal with that instead of closing herself off and building up walls.

"I shouldn't have just run like that," Emma said, her words sounding hollow and sad as she said them aloud. She was disappointed in herself and in her choice to not hear Killian out and confront this head on. "In the letter I promised I would stay and that my running days were over."

Technically the letter was a promise to a man Emma would one day love, and it hadn't been specifically addressed to Killian, but there was no denying anymore that Killian was that person. Though things had happened so quickly between them, she'd already felt like she was in this with him. Even without the details of an impending proposal or his saying she was the one. Emma's instincts had been telling her to trust this man, to choose him and to let herself fall in love. So why hadn't she just allowed herself to do that? Why did she bolt at the first sign of trouble the same way she always did?

"Well, it's not too late. You might have run, but you can always go back. I mean it's Christmas for God's sake. If there was ever a time for forgiveness, it's now."

Emma thought on that for a moment, and she realized that Belle was right. They'd both messed up, and honestly that was normal. People weren't perfect, and sometimes they did the wrong thing. But she was willing to work and to fight to make this better, and she had to believe that Killian would be too. With that realization in hand, Emma was anxious to find him again, and to say sorry for her part in all of this. As if they could read her mind, her friends all rose, giving her final hugs and well wishes as she grabbed her jacket and headed out the door. She felt the crisp, cold air, and the subtle shift in the wind, watching as a flurry of snowflakes began falling from the sky, and then she turned to head back to Killian's and she froze – seeing the man she'd been trying to get back to already here waiting for her.

The picture he made, waiting outside for her as the snow started falling in this historic part of the city, was like something from a dream. He was under one of those antique lanterns, the ones that had been in this city for hundreds of years, and that glowed a perfect golden hue that she'd always seen as romantic and beautiful. Emma swore that time stood still, and when their eyes met it was impossible to have that same fear she was grappling with before. Killian was hiding nothing from her in this moment. There was a little regret, but mostly there was relief at finding her and an undeniable love that shone through. That love propelled Emma forward, bringing her across the street to where he was, as he moved closer too, meeting her with eyes only for her and none of their surroundings. They were lost in each other, and though there was so much still to say, Emma's heart filled with hope that they could make it through this trying moment.

"Killian… you're here. How did you find me?" 

"My brother. He was with Elsa when he left and he picked up a few details. I immediately went there, and he saw that I would stop at nothing when it came to finding you and seeing you were safe."

"I'm sorry, Killian," Emma confessed in a rush, the apology coming out in a huff of air that could be seen in the winter night between them. "I know I shouldn't have run. I promised I wouldn't and… well, I'm just so sorry."

"I'll be begging your forgiveness for a number of things tonight, Emma, but first forgive me for not remembering that promise. When did you say that? It's hard to imagine I'd forget such a moment."

"I said it in the letter," Emma said, wondering why he wouldn't recall something that was so prominently featured, and then she watched as a mixed expression came to his face. On the one hand he looked relieved that there was a reason for her apology, but on the other he was stricken, likely for keeping his knowledge of her private words a secret.

"I should have told you I had it immediately, love. It was wrong of me to keep it from you, but you see, I never actually read your words. At least not beyond the introduction."

"You didn't?" Emma asked, completely thrown off by that, but finding after the initial shock that she wasn't actually that surprised. This was Killian, after all, and she had never known him to be nosy or invasive. If anything he'd been a patient man, and he'd always let her set the pace for things between them.

"No, Swan. I wanted to keep reading. Your greeting intrigued me, and I can't deny that, but I knew it was yours. I watched it fall that morning in the bakery, and I tried to get it back to you but…" he trailed off and scratched behind his ear absentmindedly, a sign that he was uncomfortable. Despite the intense feelings she had, Emma couldn't help but want to smile at that. Killian was always good looking, but this slight bashfulness had a way of warming her up inside. She took a half step closer without thinking as he continued his confession. "I heard you with Belle, and you were so mortified about all of it. Then the incident with Leroy happened, and it never felt like the right time. I know I should have just come out and said it, but all I could think was that I finally had the chance to ask you out, and I couldn't risk you saying no because of some words I never actually read."

"And were you ever going to tell me?" Emma asked, needing to know, because she hated the thought that he would have kept it a secret from her. That didn't sit well with Emma, but Killian's adamant nod as he took her hands in his convinced her that that was always his intention.

"Aye, love. I was going to mention it tonight, actually. It's why it was out in the study at all. I hated to think of doing it, especially at Christmas, but I knew I had to have the full truth out there before I told you that I love you. You deserve nothing less."

"You love me?" Emma asked, her eyes going wider and her heart fluttering madly in her chest. Killian realized too late that he'd told her of his love accidentally, and not in the way that he originally planned, but he regrouped quickly, bringing one of her hands up to kiss gently, and fighting off the cold of the night with his warm, soft lips.

"I do. I love you wholly and completely, Emma. And I know it's fast, far faster than rational people would think normal or right, but I can't help it, and I wouldn't even if I could. I love you. I think I've loved you from the moment I first saw you, and I want so much more than just this moment. This isn't a passing fancy or a fling or anything of the like. It's real, Emma. More real than words could ever sa-,"

Knowing that everything Killian was confessing to her was honest and sweet and sincere, Emma couldn't hold back anymore. She stepped into his embrace, pulling him down for a kiss and trying to show him that not only did she forgive him, but she loved him as well. His musings on things being too fast was a valid one. There was no denying that this had all happened very quickly, but as he'd said earlier in the evening, sometimes when you know, you just know. And with Killian Emma knew that this was a once in a lifetime kind of love.

Breaking away from their kiss was something Emma did reluctantly, but there was still so much that needed to be said. Making up and moving on would come soon enough, but in this moment she had to be a little bit vulnerable and speak the whole truth exactly as she felt it. "I love you too. Fast or not, I know this is a forever kind of thing, and I'm not willing to doubt it anymore just because it's not what's normally done."

"I'm glad to hear you say that, love, because forever is exactly what I'm hoping for." Killian made the vow as his thumb ran across her cheek as he stared at her adoringly. Emma could by no means read minds, but in this moment his thoughts clicked as her own. She knew he was thinking about the future, about marriage and kids and all that a life together would likely hold in store. She could see how much he wanted that, and it mirrored her own yearning.

"So… do you think we can put it behind us and get back to that magical Christmas we had going?"

"Oh it's magical is it?" Killian teased and Emma felt herself blushing even as she rolled her eyes, loving it when Killian wrapped her up in himself closer and she could feel the reverberation of his laughter. "It is magical, Emma. It's more than that, and so yes, I would very much like to go back to that."

So with that understanding between them, and with their hands locked together as they made their way to their Christmas plans and to their friends and family, Killian and Emma put the past behind them. They chose to move forward, starting a story together built on love, light, and yes, a little bit of magic. And in the end, it was exactly the kind of story that anybody would dream of, filled with many highs and only minimal downs, and which ended in hard fought and well earned happily ever after.

 _ **Post-Note: So there we have it. Part of me wishes I could have lingered a bit longer in this story, but I promised myself I wouldn't get too deep or go too over the top, but that being said there's still a little epilogue coming around New Years. Anyway, I would love to see what you all thought and thank you so so much for reading. Wishing you all a Merry Christmas and a happy holidays, and thanks for making this fandom such a fun, special world to be a part of!**_


	4. Epilogue

_**A/N: Hey everybody! So as promised I have made a small (note the small) epilogue for this cute little Christmas story, and surprise, it brings in NYE too. This flashes forward a year and a week and shows Emma and Killian enjoying their happily ever after. There are a couple of surprises and a whole lot of fluff, so I hope that you guys will enjoy it. I couldn't think of a better way to close out the year than with some cuteness. Can't wait to see what you all think, and thanks so much for reading!**_

"So, how are you feeling about going back home?"

The words from his wife – God it felt good to say that – were more packed with meaning than even Emma could know. It had been a little more than a year since they'd met, and in that time they'd fallen so completely into their love and into a life together that Killian couldn't really conceive of life before his Swan. There was a defining shift in his world after meeting Emma, and though it was hard to wait another year to marry her, Killian had done just that. They'd had a Christmas wedding, because it turned out that had always been a secret dream of Emma's, and they spent that miraculous day with just their friends and their family in a little church in the city they both called home.

Thinking back on that night, which was now only a week ago, Killian still felt his heart race and his excitement rise. It was a long build up to make Emma his wife. He'd managed to hold off on asking her to marry him only through the spring of this past year, and by June she'd had his mother's ring on her finger. If it were up to him it would have been that night last Christmas Eve, the one where Emma had run when finding the letter, but when they'd both truly come clean and started fresh together. Killian knew even before that that Emma was made for him, and so when he saw her at their wedding at last, walking towards him in a gown of white that was fit to perfection and hugged her every curve he was lost.

The memory of Emma coming towards him and ultimately taking his hands in hers to be wed was one that Killian would carry every moment for the rest of his days. He would recall the glossy tumbled curls of her golden hair, which always reminded him of the sun, hidden only somewhat by a wreath of white flowers. The bouquet she held in her grasp captured both Christmas and the intimacy of a wedding, with whites and shades of red that made him recall the scarf she wore before he even knew her name. But most of all Killian would remember the brilliance of her smile, for it was so beautiful and magnificent that it could outshine the sun.

In the instant where Emma vowed to have him for always and forever Killian was nothing short of elated. There were no words for his feelings at that point of the ceremony, because words simply couldn't stack up to all that he felt. All Killian knew was that he was the luckiest man alive for having Emma and that he was ready to give her all of him in return. Every dream she'd shared, every wish that she had he was ready to give her, and he made that clear in his vows, even pulling some of his promises from the letter that had brought them together and almost torn them apart months before. He cherished every word of that missive that she'd written, which she'd shared that night a year ago, after they'd come home from the festivities with their loved ones. It was a remarkable work in his eyes, and to see his own wants so perfectly mirrored had been breath taking. Their hopes were so aligned and it told Killian that they were made for each other and that the dreams they shared were bound to come true.

Killian could hope for nothing more than a partner who would stand by his side in good and in bad, who would love as him fearlessly as he was willing to love in return, and to challenge him and push him forward in every way. Emma was the embodiment of that, a light in the darkness and a north star in good times and in bad. She had become his best friend and his better half, and there was never a day when he didn't think of her with the fiercest kind of love. Even when they fought, and even when things weren't as perfect as the fairytales would have one believe, what they had was all he needed. It was magic, pure and simple, and Killian knew that on some level a higher power, whether it was magic or something else, had led him to this remarkable woman who truly made him whole.

"I've never been more ready for anything, my love," Killian said, answering his new bride after a short and thoughtful pause. "Save perhaps for our wedding."

Emma laughed at his added words, the sound reverberating through him as she leaned against his side. They were tucked away in a cab, coming home from the airport after a week on the beach in paradise. Her hair was even more vivid and brilliant than before, blonder from the sun at the same time her skin was kissed with color. She was gorgeous and utterly relaxed, and she was clearly enjoying his expression of devotion and want to marry her. By now, Emma was well aware of his attachment to her, and she'd grown accustomed to his never-ending need to be near her and to see her safe, happy, and cared for.

"Wow. That's a big statement seeing as you nearly charged out of the chapel with me in your arms before we could even say I do."

"I managed to contain myself," Killian responded, feigning some injury as Emma playfully rolled her eyes and shook her head.

"Barely," she said, with her smile breaking through and her eyes coming back to his, sharing her love and her light. "But after reading that letter you wrote me I didn't expect much else."

Killian willed himself not to go red at his wife's words, for he had nothing like embarrassment about what he'd written to her. It was a pre-wedding present, and honestly a necessity on his part. Her friends had insisted that they spend the night apart before the ceremony and Killian hated the distance when they were so close to their union. So, in the hopes of making himself and his intentions explicitly clear he'd written his own letter of want and desire. It felt fitting to give one to her, it being a year since she'd shared hers with him, and because he'd wanted every detail to be right, Killian found he memorized the words that had all been written from the heart…

 _My Dearest Emma,_

 _To think that there was ever a time before knowing you is staggering to me. I know it existed, that life before us was once the norm, but you and your love have transformed my world completely. What I knew before is now so different, it's so much better, and I want to start by thanking you for bringing me so much just by being you. You are the product of the life you have lead, the pain and the goodness, the sadness and the hope. There is no one else the world over like you, and for that reason, no one can ever begin to compare._

 _A year has passed since you wrote your own letter, and though it might not have had my name, I know your heart was calling out to mine. I remember every word of what you wrote, they're tucked away forever in my memory, and I know this letter can never compare. But I hope you'll trust that I mean what I say when I tell you that you are the love of my life. You, Emma Swan, are the answer I've been searching for. You are distraction and desire, joy and satisfaction, happiness and love. In short you are every good thing in this world and no one can deserve you, but I promise I will spend each day trying, my love. I will be a man who does right by you, and who never lets you feel like you are anything less than perfection._

 _Though our vows might not be said until tomorrow, I feel it's only right to lay out my feelings explicitly here, so that you may have a similar gift to the one you gave me a year ago. It is my most earnest wish to walk this world by your side, Emma. I could never envision a better partner. You see the world for all it is and you manage to find the beauty at every impasse. You make me hopeful and have helped me grow. Before you I was lost, a kind of lost I know you've felt as well. But those days are over. We've a whole life to get to, and a whole new world to explore._

 _I can't wait to see all that our life will be. I can't wait to build our perfect home, to start the family you've always truly wanted, and to face each trial with you on my team. It will be the greatest honor to be your husband, and I vow to protect, support, and love you as you have always done for me._

 _Wishing you were here, but knowing tomorrow will bring all we could ever need…_

 _Killian_

"Is it cheesy to say that I love how much you love me?" Emma asked, pulling Killian from his thoughts and brightening his world as she did. "Because I really _really_ do."

"No, Emma. Our love could never be construed that way." Emma raised a brow and he amended the statement. "And if it can, well so be it. I wouldn't have it any other way. Would you?"

"Never," she whispered before placing a kiss to his lips. It was one of so many Killian had lost count, but damn if it didn't feel like the first kiss all over again. There was so much warmth and possibility and it was impossible not to feel the weight of every worry or care lift with Emma in his arms. Right now, life was damn near perfect, but as their kiss broke and the cab slowed to their end destination, Killian hoped that in the next few minutes things would get even better.

"I believe we're here, love," Killian said, extending his hand to hers and helping her exit from the car. Only when they were outside did the haze of their kiss seem to leave Emma, and when she looked at the beautiful home they stood in front of she was shocked.

"Wait, Killian what are we doing here?" Emma asked, her emotions and anticipation all written clear as day on her beautiful face.

Killian knew that Emma must be somewhat thrown by the house that stood before them. It was a lovely place just outside the city, and Killian and Emma has seen it before completely by chance. When they'd passed it a few months back while en route to another outing, Emma confessed that it was the 'absolute dream' in her estimations for best home. If she could pick any house to live in in the world it would be one just like this one, so, having that knowledge, Killian set out to make it so, unwilling to settle for something Emma might love less and making an offer that the owner's couldn't refuse.

"We're coming home, Swan, just as I promised."

"Oh my God," Emma said as her eyes traced over the house with glee and excitement, and then it sank in that he was being honest and she ran back over to him, throwing herself in his arms and holding on tightly. "Oh my God you bought us a house!"

"Aye, I did. And though it was touch and go for a little bit, it all came together in the end."

"So all those random business calls you suddenly had on the weekends… they were this weren't they?" Emma asked, the pieces of the puzzle clicking more fully for her as she did.

"Yes. I had to have the team working round the clock to have it ready for us tonight." Truth be told there were some changes that needed to be worked to make it exactly what Emma wanted, and through consulting her friends and the pinterest page Emma didn't know he knew about, he was able to address some small gaps in the home that would make it more ideal.

"And it had to be tonight, huh?" Emma asked, her hand coming up to cup his cheek as she looked at him lovingly. "You couldn't wait for a while, despite all the work that needed doing."

"I wanted to start the New Year with my wife in our new home. I think we've waited long enough, and honestly waiting doesn't suit me."

Emma laughed at that, ducking her head into the crook of his neck before kissing him there gently. Killian held her tighter, glad that she was happy. Whatever came next would just be the cherry on top. Emma would no doubt come to make this house a real home for them both, furnishing it beyond some of the pieces he'd chosen that he thought were to both of their tastes, but he could tell he'd done a good job with this gift and that his bride was truly blissful. They hadn't even gone inside yet, but she trusted him implicitly and that was clear as day.

"Well I can safely say it's the second best wedding present that's ever existed."

Killian stilled, watching Emma as she came back to look at him still smiling. He was confused with her response and he let her know it. "This is only runner up?"

"Mhmm. I mean don't get me wrong I love this house, and you are the world's most perfect husband for doing this… but I got some good news right before I got your letter and I've been waiting to tell you ever since. It felt like the kind of thing that we should be home for."

Killian wondered what she could mean as Emma brought one of his hands to the flat of her stomach. It took a split second for him to follow her meaning and then all words escaped him. Was his wife saying what he thought she was? Was she… could she really be pregnant?

"Emma?" he asked, his mind not able to string the words for such an incredible turn of events into something spoken aloud, but his bride just smiled happily, running her thumb across his hand where it was pressed against their growing child.

"In about seven months we'll be having a baby," Emma whispered and that was all it took for Killian. With those unbelievable words he closed the space between them, kissing his wife as much as decency would allow before he realized they were still out in front of the house and not inside. It was cold this deep into winter, too cold for his wife and child to be out, and instinct demanded he get them inside quickly. With a swift motion he swung Emma up in his arms, and he led her inside, crossing over the new threshold of their home intent on celebrating all of their good news.

"So I take it you're happy then?" Emma asked as he brought them to their new room, laying her down gently on their bed and taking in the beautiful sight of her there before him. She was completely content and more than happy, and that was all Killian ever wanted for his precious Emma.

"Happy doesn't do it justice, Swan. Not even a little bit."

"Same," Emma confided, pulling him closer with a look in her eyes that told him she wanted him just as badly as he wanted her. "I love you, Killian. We've already had so much together, and now we're going to have so much more."

"Everything, Emma. We're going to have everything."

And after saying that he loved her too, and showing her exactly how much all the rest of the night long, Emma and Killian rang in the new year together, knowing that they were, in fact, on their way to having everything they could ever want and so much more.

 _ **Post-Note: Thanks so much to all of you for reading along with me. It was so fun to write this little fluff ball of a fic, especially since I got to write it as a sort of cleanse from school. I was hoping to get some smut in this fic, but unfortunately the muse wasn't feeling particularly cooperative. Oh well, there's always the next story. But anyway, it's been such a fun story to share with all of you. Hearing your reactions and thoughts has been awesome and I want to thank you all again for the support and kindness. Wishing you all a very happy new year and a great 2019!**_


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